...dressed in the clothes of melting... loongi and a cotton captain america torn salvo tee... the descriptions i would give if someone were to suddenly stop me on a new york street in soho or rochester... just as the fashion obsessed do, as it has become what gives them meaning... losing the focus on what is Real... on dressing and aromatic-ing from the beauty within...
...this past month... between the hunter's moon and this beaver's moon, i bear witness to the continued lines of self oppression... of storylines that have kept me in a frequency less than Aligned...
...entitlement has been a deep point of disenchantment in me from the sheer amount of it flaunted in so many communities across race and class lines... here in the us... here in our someone everyone owes me something... something about that is celebrated in our culture... something about proximity to oppression to being so called oppressed... unless of course you are from a country that is being bombed, a people that is being murdered... and find themselves running for ships to be smuggled across an angry ocean... than it;s less cool... less interesting... less fascinating...
fascinating this life thing - things... lots of things... lots of if i weren'ts... if you weren't than theres no potential to could, to shift, change, shape, co create... but if you are here... while you are here you can shape, can shift, can embrace the challenges that feel overwhelming, that feel like why whats the it point i don't matter, i'd rather be done with this, i'd rather move on to the next, an access to capital give you this access to resources, to consumerism consumer ways facilitates buying and disposing, bu pausing, slow economics, Nature - Dhamma - require you to pause, to deal with the matter at hand...
in the name of the One...
this past month what i learned from the previous month of dental horror, is to confront, is to not repeat the pattern of boundary crossing, of embracing the fear in ti... of laillahaillala... this was... these were intentions int he past that worked when i worked on them... and when i didn't... they went away... they were partially there...
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... a few things come to mind... embrace the issue... ask yourself what am i afraid of in this?... ask yourself what if i died right now...?... what could i have done to do it different... and ask yourself what if the other person in front you died... what could you ahve different while they were alive... ?... the combination of them and you - of them being alive and you being alive and both of you potentially not being here is more than about you being brave and expressing your fearlessness on the other... but considering their mortality, and how they are meaningful and having a compassionate impact on them as well... one that could be valuable if they were to pass... an opportunity to do a good deed, to have their Spirits raised... to experience kindness, warmth...
...this beaver moon... i take the lesson of being a fearless advocate for Self, by embracing the challenge at hand, as i did this past month... by rewriting the storylines that have kept me violated, violating, etc... i build on this observation and rewriting of storylines that have not served me... this transformtaion... by what came out of this - considering - what if the other person in front of me, that is around me, that is in my life at this moment were to die... what would i want them Know that will Align them deeper in Love...?...
...i will do this by considering with those closest to me and rewriting story lines that keep me putting off Honoring them and me - my mom - and me putting off the house the family... my dad and putting off the hug/s, the writings, the library project... my brother and putting off the yoga, the manifesting/success of the Work i do... the people who are looking to me for Guidance... and ending up dead, dying, hurt, disaffecting - by providing Guidance... for Worship... not to be worshipped...
