full moon sept 2016

quick. it happened quick. like a hashtag. like a snap chat. the full moon rose, cast its spell, left me in a harvest of questions on purpose vs employment vs entrepreneurship vs past vs future vs everyone else...

i've been creating dualities, ending up with equations that manifest in the clock that stares me down like a warden, reading 9:11 when i look. am and pm.

i'm unclear on which if any of the symbolism of 911 this is pointing to - chile sept 11 1971 when u.s. fighter jets rammed into and bombed the presidential palace of salvador allende, the democratically elected president, assasinated in this coup and replaced with the brutal despot, pinochet. or is it the sept 11 2001, when  2 planes crashed into the twin towers and killed close to 3000 people. or is it the cops. the number you may dial in the case of an emergency.

whatever the case, 9+1+1 = 11 = 1+1=2.

two is the number of duality. what is referred to as illusion in islamic and vedic texts, espoused by vednatists and sufis. the maya.

been in the maya. caught between the maya and that which is real.

real is always, infinite. the number 8, reached only after getting to 9, the ledge. ready to jump? makes no sense if you think in western linear thought. unless you're a mathematician. if you are then you know algebra, the formulary code of alchemists. all things al- are originate from the arab world, which through the path of surrender was in spirit-intellectual dialogue with western eastern central southern africa, central asia and india, and east asia. this conversation led to a confluence of ideas subservient to the science of spirituality.

what am i subservient to? last month, the full moon signified truth, being honest. i feel better in this regard, growing deeper here.

this month, i would like to grow deeper in being a disciple of ayurveda. of seeing and working from here. this month, i'd like to zero in on my angle, my focus, grow deeper with just this path of traditional medicine - by moving away from perfection, from trying to know everything and being crippled by research, and instead keeping it simple, experiencing and speaking from experience.

is this what i want?

gurrukal tells me the only way to move forward is to know what you want. you have to know what you'd like to accomplish and then manifest it, seek it out. it will happen. but focus.

what do i want? a family, real community, a loving wife and kids, building compassion through structures and values, through sustainable communities that have a deep loving relationship with the earth, all its diversity of species, and plant life, and ideas, and peoples.

i want the wars the violence to end, the racism to end, the classism to end, the greed and exploitation to cease, the apathy and that's them to transform to that could be me.

where does the traditional medicine come in here?

being a healer. drawing people closer to compassion for themselves, for their body, and by way of this, their food, and by way of this, the earth, and by way of this plant life, other species, and other humans. respect Royalty.

the traditional medicine for me is supporting people in getting closer to the traditional way, the ancient ways, the way of sacred, and compassion and community.

i want to stay away from teaching and commodifying ancient knowledge like yoga and ayurveda. instead i want to make sure i share it in a way that draws people deeper into compassion. at the root of yoga is compassion is spirituality. at the root of ayurveda is spirituality.

this is how i want to practice, teaching and growing and sharing spirituality.

no schools will give me the license to do this. no jobs hire me to do this. but it must be done. we are missing compassion for each other, for ourselves..."and many of us, by the way we act, we even lost our minds", malik el shabazz said.

what it sounds like i want is to build on the spiritual roots of the medicines i carry and get deeper on this and focus from here as i do the work. the work is massage and bodywork, herbalism, and food. all of it is yoga and ayurveda. yoga is at the center of all that i do. the essence of yoga is ALLAHoo. the evidence is in the breath. breathe deep. dive. make it so. grow deeper.

so this full moon. i get deeper with the medicine in the way jesus would. i put myself out there. avoid over-information and stick to the basics - the Essence -the ancient mathematics of the medicine.

in a few words, this month i am a disciple of vata, pita, kapha in all things, by way of practicing medicine in this way; i am a disciple of yoga in all things, by writing, moving, speaking, connecting from a place of yoga - breath, focus, movement, flexibility, strength.

this month i manifest this by setting up the circumstances that require me to be in self-effacement. al-hallaj, escaping the prison wall and doing and making it happen...