walking through a landscape of dreams, some cities, some country, some in the mojave. somehow, my most recent dream has found me back in the city i sought to escape, like a dream i hope not to return to. somehow in the city, i've ended up in a job that is less than ideal, that feels toxic and exhausting and a place i can't leave. there are kids involved. they are used to adults leaving them. its a lot of work. it's in a direction that is removed from the road i saw lights of destination in.
but that's it. the journey is the destination. this is part of the journey. big step tells me sometimes you gotta eat a sh@t sandwich. that you have responsibilities, and you gotta do what you gotta do even if its less than ideal. my brother tells me to go with my heart, but if i am to do something that compromises my path, than use it as an opportunity to plan your next steps.
that makes sense. haven't much planned before. haven't spent a great deal of time working out next steps. instead, i go from moment to moment, doing things if they are interesting at the moment, often falling into circumstance instead of shaping circumstance.
last month my intention was to engage in vata pita kapha in all things. i did this in bits. but forgot. last month i said i would focus more on the spiritual aspect of the medicine i carry, instead of getting to wrapped up in the western dissections of it. last month, i said i would move from a place of yoga in all things. i said i would escape the prison wall as i grew deeper in self-effacement.
i did get deeper in yoga. i've learned that focusing on my center in asana practice, strengthened my back, relieved it from some of the pains i've been experiencing. i learned from taking a class under the instruction of a friend who follows a lineage, how much my center was needed in folding, in directing, in navigating movement. i learned how much deeper i need to get in alignment. i also learned recently through my research and writings on bone health, that too much in the way of stretch was electro-positive in the magnetic fields of our bone, which sets off osteoclasts, leading to bone loss. this versus compression - electro-negative - which strengthens bone.
yoga is at once flexibility and strength, accomplished through breath-meditation. i've been exhaling longer than my inhales.
this month, the intention i put forth is planning, presence, and peace. the three positive p's.
planning my next steps in life - housing, family, community, medicine-man practice, entrepreneurship/family-economics, literary movement, setting up plans for work, putting them in place, to maximize effectiveness and minimize stress and extra time lost.
presence - being where i am when i am. when i am at work, i am there, but when i am home, or elsewhere, i am in those places.
peace - operating from al-Salam - the Source of Peace, by being and moving from breath-consciousness, letting my job be my karma yoga, being present from peace, planning from peace, delving in ayurveda and yoga from peace.
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