...compassion, mercy...the repetition throughout the Book (the Recitation), scripture, transcribing the words of One-ness through the channel of the prophet muhammad (s.a.w)...
start everything with this - bismillah hiRahman niRahim - in the name of ALLAH, the Most Compassionate, the Most Merciful...
rahma being the arabic root word for womb...
the root of compassion and mercy (Rahman/Rahim) is the womb...the space of birth, of nourishment, of quietness, of growth, of formation, where the big bang happens - collision, conglomeration, existence...
compassion comes from a space of the womb, something deeply internal/eternal, from a place of that which is Always, a-dwee-vedanta - the place in which duality ceases to exist...one with the ONe...
there is a place in the sleep stage which is neither thought nor dream - a complete darkness...this is said to be the place of Eternity, of the One-ness...the witness to all else...
sunlight...
the cosmos is filled with darkness...how? how when sunlight travels through it...? when it lights every object it touches? sunlight is seen only in reflection...the moon, our satellite, the comets, and planets in orbit, all only reflect the sun...
the vast universe is space, is the space between, is nothingness...is the deep dark sleep...
...black gold...sipping coffee at the cafe, contemplating the mornings lessons in vedanta and the past months challenges that fliker into this month...over two g's heisted by the ukranian used car dealer in sheepshead bay...and i am here writing to get Light on how to approach the situation, how to embrace this opportunity from a place of Essence...all praise is due...
...as i wonder how to get a title for a car i bought without a title, from a place of trust...part of me sees the flickers of a past self, one that was reactive, one always close to rikers, close...one that was deeply emotional, reactive, expecting benefit, indecisive, last-minute actor, suddenly urgent, lazy, entrenched in fear, wanting to avoid conflict, wanting everything to be okay, tucking under the blanket and pretending it's not happening, that it will go away, that someone else will do something about it, co-dependent, someone will rescue me, consumed, tunnel-visioned, evasive, eschewing, pretending i was going to do something instead of doing, pretending, actor-ing...
...instead of paused, pensive, clear, decisive, diligent, without expectation, neither pain nor pleasure, equananimous, attempting, struggling, independent, interdependent, forward, transparent, direct, communicative, compassionate, quiet, simple, light-hearted, without pretenses, fearless, loving, responsible, completing my responsibilities, un-consumed, light, Light...
what does yoga look like off the mat for me? brings up the question what has yoga on the mat been for me...?
...sometimes it's a routine that i desperately clutch to, to anchor me, to keep me from going mad in a world that values hustlers, thugs, craftiness, underhandedness, delineations of professionalism...values that are in opposition...i value family, relations, connections, meaningful ones, village, building - through writing, touch, nutrition, fasting, movement...
in yoga, my movement is to connect, salat - connection - preparing my body to be in a state of meditation...in yoga, i am often fighting shaitan, fighting the tendency towards giving up, laziness, status quo, mediocrity...in yoga, through this body, i am able to reach into greater possibility...
...asana...half the time is movement to wake my body into alert, into strength, into a space of possibility...the first 45minutes are this...the remaining 15 minutes are attempting the aspiration, the deeper pose, that which will unlock a secret...
...asana is a space that is non-negotiable, yet supple...it has to happen...it has to happen for a time period...it is a connection with my body, my spirit, my mind - gives me a sense of reinvigoration, rejuvenation, completion...
how do i apply these ancient practices i have been touting, that i have a reclusive practice with - prayer, meditation, yogum, nutrition, fasting...? how do i apply them in a state of conflict? in my current dilemma?
by being the Truth, the satyagraha underlining this - ahimsa, satya, asteya - a space of empty, a space of working from that which is Always, without emotion, without a cling to pain nor pleasure - to stay in the pose even it is painful to witness and work past it...
off the mat...this conflict can be dealt with through detoxing those states of character that have defined much of my life...it means shedding the cloak of fear by being naked in truth - clear, transparent, deliberate, supple, quiet, diligent, responsible, un-consumed, independent, interdependent, equananimous...values - give yourself over to the values you hold dear, you recognize as truth, and give up those values that keep you engrossed in a turmoil of falsehood, fear...
...what a great opportunity to grow...all praise is due...
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