the medicine of situations

situations can humble u.

cryptic, right? situations - what do you mean?

u know. situations.

my boy called me up the other day, said, yo i got a situation... he didn't need to say more, i knew. i talked to my cousin shortly after, he told me everything was cool, except this situation he was in. my other cousin told me her man got into a situation. her voice trembled like port au prince, what can i do?

my amma brings it up every other week, calling me six times a day, a situation, some uncle i forgot about, you know the one who used to  come over when you were in high school and always ate like it was no body's business... she tells me about an aunty, a distant cousin, a childhood homie - dead, cancer, car accident, divorced, suicide, deported, locked up, mad. 

i listen, nod. word, i say. that's crazy. 

 it is crazy, mad. wonder how more of us aren't mad. wonder how we are just going about the day.  but we r, sometimes hardened, head down, hands balled in fists and beating our chest. sometimes we just get numb to it, like my boy Step. he tells me to do the same, forget them, look out for yourself, do for yourself. he lives it. forgets me sometimes, but it's cool. Step's doing Step.

 sometimes i forget this Gift. just move like i got metal balls chained to my ankles, my face scrunched up all nasty, kicking asphalt and feeling sorry for myself. but then a situation happens.

 it's wild how it takes a crazy situation to be a wakeup call, so-so tells me the other night, when we r on a late night call, both our voices in r.e.m. her homegirl got into a car accident, was strapped up in a hosptial in queens like a mummy.

 it's hard to take life for granted after a situation. especially after the situation happens to you. it can be crushing, but it can be much more. it's an opportunity, a rebirth.

 i'm rebirthing again, inside a warm womb, given another chance to embrace the Beauty by the Mystery, my head bowed down in submission to the Oneness. all praise is due.