...bismillah...
... if you feel something than do... do you act on it?... what have you not acted on today... since you woke up... for fear of a consequence>,,, what is it that keeps you in the cage that you pace as you watch anther full moon and wonder where time is going.. how it doesnt feel like you have made progress...
...progress is the easurement by which humans weigh their life... examine it for meaning... it us unsaid.. an intangible... how are you making progress... for the tribes it is their growing of their community... of their tribe... of growing in their bond towards one another... all in Surrender to yashua... this takes Work... to building/growing the kingdom of heaven...
...for me... it means...
...i guess i lost track... i guess i never knew... since last month... last month we were a crew of three... me and david and brandon... walking up and down the commons and cayuga and titus... trying to understand this thing... trying to understand ourselves as men in relation to the lovers in our life... to women... to the babylon that made no sense to us... the world of being tethered by muzzles and crisis information that we mostly saw in the ups and downs of masks that people around us wore...
...here... we became a place foe each other... from randomly run ins to hollering... to glasses and smoke... to words of wisdom... "i ask myself where this is coming from" brandon said of his feelings... when he assesses situations...
...and then he disappeared and we formed a mens group... mostly cause i wanted to leave k with a space for him to heal to have support... i kind of enjoyed the informal... the running into the spontanaiety but soon the mens group made sense... it felt good... it helped to be heard... to be honest with myself and others without having to censor...
...since the last full moon.. packed and reduced and gave away things... and bought honey to make medicine and foraged more... and started an herbs album... and made an ad hoc plant press... and started paying attention to the striations on bark and grew deeper in my a relation with brave-bird... my 05 prius... and listened to the messages and stories of mary... and spent time reading the esoteric spiritual texts they held... to learn... to keep an open ear... and listened to the wise teachings of shoshana... and hung with drinkers and smokers without drinking or smoking... and prayed more... 3-5 times a day... closer to 4-5 times a day... and tried a new pose... and manifested the 99 names... and grew in charles dodson's alter ego lewis carrol through his fractals of alice in wonderland... and in my relations to writers and my own writing through part ii of the writing group... and embraced rejection without being buried by it... and slept earlier and got up earlier again... and expressed truth and boundaries to k... and the afflicted soul of september that october sought to get lost in... and that november sought to take action on... has brought up sneaky and being sneaky and noticing this whether it means borrowing salt to condiment food or avoiding a question that i'm uncomfortable with... or getting food from a church for lunch... or... the list goes on.... there is a lot... and so this month... the intention is to expose sneaky to presence it... by acting on truth... on my intuition on manifesting instead of trying to play checkers and sneak attack... i would like to manifest a house for my mama and poppa and us towards community... building and Being community... medicines - a self love kit and CSA... a yoga course... and another writing course... and the yogi album and ashtanga ii and iii... and a wife and kids... and Love... Close to You...
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