i ate for the first time in 10 days last night. a short bowl of plain kichoree. the kind of bowl japenese buddhist monks eat from, so as to keep air, and water to a majority in the stomach.
when eating, the stomach should be 1/3rd air, 1/3rd water, and the remaining third is the portion of food you should have, not more. this is according to "medicine of the prophet", a book compiled in the 11th century, as a guide to traditional/islamic medicine, based on the teachings (hadith) of the prophet muhammad (s.a.w).
the prophet fasted throughout the year, had what would be referred to in today's nutrition-seeking health world as inter-mittent-fasting.
for ten days i had variations of water - lemon water w/maple syurp and herbal teas. i watched myself wither. i heard the battle inside, the war that waged between the noursihing and destructive bacteria within me.
our outside is supposed to be a reflection of our inside. if our skin is supple and clear, our epithileal linings, our mucosa and mucous membranes should mirror this. if our teeth are supposed to be a window into our bone health, my bones are in need of great care. i've accumulated many cavities over the years. a steady diet of snickers, jawbreakers, corner-store munchies before class.
we are all dealt a hand. we play our cards accordingly. or we go with circumstance. we default on passivity, of going through the motions, of waiting for someone else to make things different for us. so, slavery will go away, because other people somewhere out there are doing something about it. but you, you have your job, and your family, and your not for slavery, in fact, you're against it, but it's happening over there...
you wait...i wait...we wait for bombs to fall over us to do something...we wait for the heart attack, the colon cancer, the diabetes diagnosis to change our diet. we wait for our termination notice, of a year of unemployment, of no repsonses from employers to figure out how to be self-suffiicient. we wait for something to happen to a loved one, to spend great amounts of time with them. we wait for the police to shoot at one of our brothers, fathers, spouses, to cry out against police brutality, we wait to be locked up and thrown in the belly of a zoo, to identify with tigers and polar bears and elephants, to think why no one is doing anything about the prison system. we wait for our house to be shot up and bombed by the military to cry out against war and ask why others aren't doing anything about it, we...
...i got tired of waiting. i saw the cage of fear i was standing in. i saw and decided to escape. decided to really live by the word, instead of reading and discussing and quoting it to friends over binge samosa and tandoori chicken and biscuits and cheese and crab legs and pasta primevera...decided it was time to do...so i heard it again...heard the words of the prophet...die before you die...heard it and saw my self, the guy hidden in the cage, playing nicely with the plugged in, the masses of arm-chair activists-critics, perfectly concoted in the chemcial formula of matrix. plugged in heavily...i fasted...really fasted...really...
...stopped eating altogether...stopped the almonds and brown rice and kale...stopped food...and watched this petite frame cave into famine east bengal 1945, famine liberated bangladesh, 1975, famine ethiopia 1985, famine palestine...famished, i withered, grew dizzy...
...spun into a trance of quranic melody...spun out of the sweat lodge, and bed, and massage sessions till i left this body, till the screams that emerged from this belly were a distant strangers, till i recognized air...
...air, i realized is sustenance. we can go without food for a while. we can go without even liquids for a time. but without air...60 seconds...
air is food. thankful for air. for the importance of this nose and pharynx, larynx, trachea, bronchi, secondary/tertiary bronchioles, terminal bronchioles, alveoli, alveolar sacs...exchange of pulmonary breath - a necessary cooperation, negotiation - carbon for oxygen...
...in my rebirthing, i ask myself, a friend asked me, how will you do things differently?
Salaam Chutz,
ReplyDeleteBeautiful description of the provisions Allah has showered upon us. The trifecta of food drink and air. I also appreciated you stressing that air is most vital and subhanAllah it is the one no man can deprive another of or sell like food and drink. Air is provision and submission to the most high in one of the purest forms.
JazakAllah Chutz :)