...always live like a visitor... a traveler the prophet said... even if you are living breathing in the region neighborhood you are from... don't be from there... when you believe you are from there you begin to perceive others in a certain light... you begin to build a sense of arrogance i am from here and they are not... i've felt that at times... i felt that when the building my folks have been in for 40+ years shed its families only to be replaced by young professionals... i'd like to say they were primarilly of a certain ethnic/racial b.g to appease your sensibility of the false binary racial paradigm that ignores the capacity of good and evil... benevolence and greed in all... so it is a multicultural cast of gentrifiers... hyphenated americans: white and asian, carribean and african, black and latin... 20 and 30 somethings... single or coupled... and sometimes i feel like an outsider in this building and i perceive the way they engage with my immigrant parents as outsiders... and it makes me want to say they have been here for longer than your parents have been alive... but this stems from a place of being from... vs... acceptance... accepting the change... the possible perceptions of us as outsiders... my perception of them as pretentious and rude... all of it stems from my own identification with this rental apartment in a building that is like a swivel door... 

...You Are only from One place... ALLAH... from ALLAH we emerge to ALLAH we return... 

...this is just a passing through... 

...rich roll had a legendary surfer on his podcast who said... when you have an art everything else you do is only to support this process... so if you have to work as a dishwasher or waiter or landscaper... all good... these other things are just jobs... your Work is your art and everything else supports this... although i agree with this... other jobs can take a toll on your energy level and take you away from your craft... so it may be more healthy to have part time gigs to allow full time focus on your craft... 

...this legendary surfer also said what i've heard other wise men say - it is only in the face of death do we realize living... so go to your edges... what are your edges?... what is my edge with/in writing?... it is to write for several hours... right now i only do an hour at most... in a row... to complete what i start... i have a tendency to start writing projects and not complete them...  

...rich roll added to this by saying how ironically the narrative of pop culture is for us to seek comfort... to look to shows like cribs... lifestyles of the rich and famous... of making the american dream - house car dog spouse... but it is in this comfort that we experience dying... not death... not fana... not the annhilation of ego but the attachment to security to the couch... to being safe... to our safe yoga poses and t.v. and rotuines.. and job... embrace chaos... edges... fear...