...@ 3:17am... tonight... tomorrow morning... where will you be?... the full moon will apex then... a climax before the wane... pay attention...
...these are the lessons that are given to you from divinity... from that which resides in You as close to You as your jugular...
...these are the lessons that are locked out of school... or may be there... may be tossed into a lesson by a teacher as one of those moments... there are many... there are great teachers... there are great moments in school... but i've been asking myself and wonder if you have asked - what is the purpose of school?... why is it structured the way it is?... 8 periods... 45min-60min... grades... mono-generational per grade... starting at kindergarten and not ending till 12th grade...
...if nothing else... do we really need to be in school for a minimum of 13 years (not including college, etc.)...?... why?... is this a meaningful use of our time?...
...if we do need to goto school for 13 years... why do we need to goto college for another 4?... if it's to specialize why didn't we specialize somewhere in those 13 years?...
...thing is... i'm not interested in convincing you of anything... these are just some questions i have and the more i think of it... the more disheartening it is to think that parents are subjected to surrendering their children to school and are instilled with the belief that somehow school is a good thing... that will make them good people and good citizens...
...but school made me a horrible person... it made me hate myself... i was in a school with a multitude of ethnicities and somehow this led to us warring with each other... our ethnicities becoming our deficits... our greatest weakness...
...school made me fearful... i was worried about what my peers thought of my clothes sneakers, words, ability or inability to figt to talk to girls, etc.
...school tore me apart from my mama and papa... school made me see them as other... as not cool... as backward... it replaced my home language with a language that was neither viable on the marketplace nor at home, nor anywhere...
...school traumatized me... i was worried about fighting... constantly... i was worried about the way other kids may try to harm me physically or verbally or inclusion/exclusion... i was worried about teachers saying something mean, giving me a poor grade... making fun of my name by getting it wrong unapologetically, of picking on me...
...school made me dumb... instead of curious and wondering... i was trying to figure out how to fit in... how to fit into what was cool in the cess pool... what was acceptable by other kids... whether i would pass or not... whether i got the right answer or not...
...school brings out the evil of kids... i want to be real clear that unlike a lot of critiques i hear about the evil teacher and the poor kids... what i saw and experienced as a student and then as a teacher is the evil potential of kids... their cruelty... and given circumstances... humans are prone to this... so what about schools in a multicultural society like nyc bring out this evil... there must be something?... anyway i want to make that point real clear... i also don't think it's just a matter of white supremacy... depending on the ethnic makeup of your school (kids and teachers) and you in ratio to that, you may experience black supremacy, brown supremacy, etc... it is more romantic and easy to tout the party line and make the situation black and white... it just doesn't fit with the reality of a place like nyc...
...school robbed me of precious life... if i knew then what i know now, i would've dropped out in the 5th grade, or not have gone to school at all.... but if i dropped out in the 5th grade i'd spend time with my mom, hanging out in the kitchen and learning the herbalism i didn't learn way into my adulthood... i would've learned our ancient nutrition and culinary culture... and dishes... and be cheffing up amazing dishes... i would've been proficient in bengali and qur'anic arabic... i would have learned to sew and make my own clothes instead of learned to be a consumer... i would've learned world history and literature and dialectics by spending time with my dad in his office... learning the importance of objectivity in journalism in really sharing two sides of a story... i would've been writing articles and interviewing people and been much more adept at it then i am now...
..if i didn't school i would have had years of real exploration, deep confidence, spiritual maturity, and the lsit goes on...
...i also want to speak for myself... for many kids from families where school is a safer option... schools may look veery different... and be amazing... for kids like me... who grew up on the economic margins... poorer than many kids who wore all the nice clothes... but came from a rich cultural tradition of ancient values and ways... school was a major disservice... and i would encourage anyone who comes from an ancient wisdom tradition not to send their kids to school...
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