...in the name of the Most... Compassionate... Mercy... i bear witness over and over as death is everywhere... and leaves me you us in a state of wonder, awe, hamlet...
...hamlet is once a noun, adjective and verb... the state of not getting life, of being in wonder, amiss, crushed by the ceiling that is existence... that even alexander the great had to die... became a jumble of bones... and of course if we do reach old age then our death will be less romantic... less memorialized...
...in the name of...
...blessed summer solstice... blessed blessings... the time of year when the day is longer than any other day... when you shed light on what is happening in your life.. illumine what is holding you back... and let what is holding you back burn...
...what is hold you... keeping you from You... from being One... from being non dual in Your relations... in the past it was being engaged in identity politics in an us and a them and in my recent past it has been the opposite - have little room for identity politics... feeling betrayed by it... feeling like it wasted my time and made me separate and dishonest in how it made me pretend... play into the racial theatre of an us and them... and in the process letting all the multicultural/ethnic/racial us' get away with being ethnocentric, ant- this and that, violent, self-involved, hierarchical in who's more oppressed... but even this line of thought... this critique is after all separating... creates walls... lacks compassion...
...if the One behind our breath, behind our safe placement through the womb and our making it here... this far... whether you are 5 or 85... is constantly showing Compassion... is constantly in a state of giving ... even if it is cancer and you're on your way out... then who are we... me... to lack compassion... to judge... to dismiss...?...
... i can only go deeper in Love... if what i'm worried about is people not getting my critique of overembracing identity... i can only go deeper in letting go more of my own identity...
...what is my identity? thinking i am someone... that i am a yogi writer chef spiritual universal... all these are identities as well... they serve me in that they keep me in a place of discipline and Reaching... they hinder me in that they keep me in an identity... with ego... with criteria... the only Criteria is You...
...in having You as central to me that i am moved by Love and not evidence... with Creating and not proving... with Reaching and not passing time... with art and not pretending and tracing and passing off...
...letting yogi Lover artist Be a path towards You vs a me that i want to make happen...
...i want to let burn the identity of me that is not Working towards You by seeking to promote me and seeking to have criteria vs Seeking to make You the criteria... how would yoga look if this was the case... continuous... honoring of ancestral knowledge... of play... of breath and bandha and scripture and Guidance not from a point of knowing... but to grow Closer... to do to become Closer... replacing identity of me with path of yogi towards you... wow what a difference...
...i want to let burn the putting off and fully commit in my path towards You through growing deeper in my healing journey... not to prove a point... not to get accolades in instagram... but to Reach... to be in community... to be in circumference... to make happen... through giving my all in Love of her of parents and bothers and friends and showing up for them... in poetry and writing and yoga... fully seeing things through by going deep in the work and having circumstances that anchor me... sharing... acts that result in greater union and communion... i.e a poetry chapbook for others to grow deeper in Love in their own life and share this...
...i want to burn expectation of reciprocal by Trusting that the Work itself is the reward... that Love itself and doing/Working from a place of Love will be what is my reciprocity... going deeper in the Work that is Guided by Love - drawing, writing, yoga vignettes... medicine making... holding space for others to go through a shared experience...
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