between aspiring towards warrior codes devised by ancestry and worrying about not enough personal space/privacy/independence - i am in battlegrounds with myself vs myself, my ancient self and my modern self, my community movement and my hyper-individualisms.
with the setting of the sun i turn into a worrier, scratching my head about rent, job stuff, future stuff. discipline sets me free. i recall focus, hit the books. stay away from: gotta get that money, get that real estate, push that retail. but i slip, fall into the cracks of the internet after midnight like a grown orphan annie, looking at big houses and dream of cooking medicines, raising herbs, hanging with fam next door, and stepping to the corner to philosophize with the village i live in.
pipe dreams stay in a pipe in the crack of internet surfing, if there is no action to back it up. act. work.
prepared chard and yam for dinner, ate by 7:20. no more gorging of everything in the fridge after. i ate less yesterday. felt good. after a coffee in the morning i didn't eat till 2:30. felt good. body loved it. loved being a warrior. loved smelling all the deep fried goodies of the growing street food culture and walk on by, focused on the Deeper.
we're complex. you're both warrior and worrier, and of course so much more :)
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