growing lighter. growing into deep movements inside. black white red brown rumble and flow. yellow afternoons. colors. lots of colors. i see the color that i Am. walk towards it.
people will come and go i was never told but live. ny is a swivel door for many. community is a yoga class. everything i learned about tribe, loyalty, looking out from my indigenous family, i unlearned from the outside world.
friends are of convenience here, my ammu tells me. shuker bhondu, dukher bhondu nai: when things are good they're around, when things are not, they are ghost.
don't be a ghost, be a spirit. amiri baraka. my boy kaz texted this to me, some time back. when i was becoming the ghosts i was around. when i embraced the motto nas advanced in memory lane: born alone, die alone, no crew to keep my crown or throne.
i am a spirit these days, focused beyond the ephemeral relationships i am around. there is much that is beautiful about the world, about people, about women, about men. they may be an mmm mmm fly, but it's a moment. i know that now. i recall someone saying it once upon a time: you're fly, but you're not that fly.
everyone is fly and no one is that fly that you should lose your focus on the greater Path. perhaps, except for family, especially if they are indigenous, if they carry themselves in the indigenous way, in the way of villages.
the closest semblance of village, i've seen in america, are the hoods here. hood, not brown, or black, or red, or yellow, or white. not hip hop or spoken word or hats turned back. hood - village people, surrounded by struggle and the potential of humility. the more degrees and upwards in class, the greater the appointment-schedules-isolation culture.
i trust and maintain my loyalty to my family and people of the village persuasions, to Air Land Liquid Atmosphere Heat - ALLAH - who is the Prize my existence depends on. all praise is due to/for ALLAH.
as i enter into stage 2 of this fast - raw foods - i give thanks for the opportunity to grow Deeper in the Path of traditional medicine in the displaced quagmire of jungle city, new york. after over 3 decades here, i'm beginning to know this city a little, how it causes balance and imbalance. my grandfather, the village medicine man would have little effectiveness here with his unani/ayurvedic/bush medicine.
rest in peace: jimmy, eric, day-day. your Spirit is merged. all praise is due...
Walking the streets of unfamiliarity and yet familiarity. A place I call home but a place I fear at times. Is this me? Is this where I'm suppose to be? Dreaded faces, darkness in the light. I feel the cold jump from those around me. I sense the pain that lingers within them. Finding peace in the birds that fly above me, reminding me that I'm not alone. Stay strong, listen, and be with us...become one of us. Happy to know that there is a light that lingers within the darkness. It is not too late to pull through. Accept what you've already created. Accept your inner light and let it shine for all to see. You are not alone. Stay strong light being, for you are more than what you think. When you come home, you will remember and we can play this game again. Stand your ground. Walk proud in the hard streets. Your strength comes from within and you will pull through. The softness within you, creates peace and that is what is needed. Let your exterior lead you, guide you to where you are wanted but stay and discover the beauty that is within you. Be grateful that you are walking on this Earth. I am grateful Mother Earth and father sky. Thank you for giving birth to me. Now it is my time to give you what you have given me in return....Life.
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